one year

Today marks one year since we arrived to our new home. July 1, 2008 will forever be a day where our lives changed more than we could have ever expected. I don't think all of the preparation in the world would have fully prepared us for this life. We were pretty much ready to be turned upside down but didn't truly know what was in store (well Stan had a little more idea than I did since he had done it before). I am so thankful for every minute of this past year.

When I said goodbye to my Granny she told me I have always been like a rock and that's how she knew I would be ok. That has stuck with me for the past year. Maybe because I know both she and I wonder if that was our last face to face conversation or maybe because through her telling me that I realized that I am that way because of her. It is a trait passed down from her, through my mom and to me. I also remember very clearly her telling me once while she was in the hospital 'I might as well laugh because there is no point in crying!' I have seen her cry, but never for herself.

Although I have shed a few tears over the past year I can count the times on one hand. I always remembered what she said. I knew she meant that it's not a bad thing to cry, just make sure if you do make it a good one! Tears of frustration came once so forcefully that in the end I did laugh at myself. Not because I didn't have every right be frustrated but because I had allowed 6 months of frustration to build up before releasing it--let me tell you, that was a good one. Only someone who has lived in a cross culture situation can completely understand those feelings. The frustrations that come from not being able to communicate something as simple as how much broccoli you need or from telling a taxi driver your address 5 times, being oh so careful with pronunciation and then finally just saying 'I will direct you'. There are many areas of China where most people speak at least some English and I don't live in one of them.

After saying all that I have to say that I wouldn't trade any of those moments, not one. They are a part of my story. Part of the lessons God needed to teach me. I said in a previous post that I love where I am in life and that is 100% true. A year ago I couldn't possibly know the joy I would feel being exactly where God wants me. I know at any moment HE could change that and we could be somewhere different entirely, but for now when I look ahead 10 years I see myself doing the same thing...just maybe not pregnant. :)

I'm excited about the doors that are opening for us with work. Did I think it would take a year for things to really start happening, not really. Do I think we needed to learn some things before they did, definitely. As weird as it sounds I am so glad to call a country that is foreign to me my home. I see people who have lived there for 10 or more years and they still have what we affectionately call 'China days'. I hope I never forget to learn from those frustratingly wonderful days.